The caravan holiday was cheap, cramped, weather-dependent and enormously memorable, which is a fair summary of most good childhoods. Here are twelve things anyone who had them will recognise.
1. The Tension of Reversing Onto the Pitch
Arrival involved a manoeuvre conducted with one adult driving, another shouting directions, and an audience of everyone already parked.
It never went smoothly and it was never discussed afterwards. Reversing onto the pitch is the caravan holiday moment that set the tone for the entire week.
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2. Everything Having Two Purposes
The table folded into a bed, the seat lifted to become storage, the bed converted back at breakfast, and the whole interior was reconfigured twice a day.
Nothing had a single function and nothing stayed where it was. Everything having two purposes is the caravan design principle that governed every hour inside.
3. The Smell of Gas and Damp Canvas
Bottled gas, the awning, and whatever the upholstery had absorbed over a decade combined into a smell that existed nowhere else.
It arrived the moment the door opened and is instantly recognisable decades later. The smell is the caravan detail people describe first without being asked.
4. Rain on the Roof
A thin roof directly above your head turns ordinary rain into something extraordinarily loud, and heavy rain into an event.
It was either the best sound of the holiday or the reason nobody slept. Rain on the roof is the caravan experience that had no equivalent at home.
5. The Awning as an Extra Room
A canvas extension erected over an afternoon with considerable difficulty, doubling the floor space and holding the wet coats, boots and folding chairs.
It flapped all night and leaked wherever it was touched. The awning is the caravan addition that everyone argued about putting up.
6. The Shower Block Walk
Washing meant a walk across the site with a towel, a wash bag and flip-flops, in whatever weather was happening, at a time dictated by how busy it was.
The queue and the water temperature were both lotteries. The shower block walk is the caravan routine that made everyone appreciate a bathroom afterwards.
7. The Chemical Toilet Conversation
Every caravan had one, its emptying was a designated job assigned to a specific adult, and children were told nothing about the process.
The subject was handled with more discretion than almost anything else in family life. The chemical toilet is the caravan feature everyone remembers and nobody discussed.
8. Making Friends Within an Hour
Site children formed groups almost immediately, played together for a week without exchanging surnames, and never saw each other again.
The friendships were intense and completely temporary. Making friends within an hour is the caravan holiday social pattern that only works at that age.
9. Card Games and the Weather Radio
When it rained for a day, entertainment consisted of a pack of cards, a board game with pieces missing, and an adult listening intently to a forecast.
The forecast was treated as an oracle. Card games and the weather radio are the caravan holiday fallback that got used more than anyone planned.
10. The Tiny Cooker and What Came Off It
A two-ring burner and a grill produced an entire week of meals, and everything tasted faintly of gas and enormously better than it should have.
Cooking outdoors in the awning was the ambitious option. The tiny cooker is the caravan kitchen that produced meals people still talk about.
11. Being Sent Out After Breakfast
With four people in a space the size of a small bedroom, children were dispatched outdoors early and expected back at meals.
That was the arrangement rather than a punishment, and it produced most of the good memories. Being sent out after breakfast is the caravan holiday routine that gave everyone room to breathe.
12. The Same Site Every Year
A great many families returned to one place annually, took the same pitch, and knew the layout, the shop, the walk to the beach and which families would also be there.
The familiarity was the point rather than a failure of ambition. The same site every year is the caravan holiday pattern that turned a campsite into a second home.
A Small Box and a Week Outdoors
The caravan holiday worked because the accommodation was too small to stay in, which pushed everyone outside for a week – and outside is where the memories were made.
Holidays have changed and very few people would choose to go back to a two-ring burner and a walk to the shower block. But a week where the accommodation was cramped enough to be irrelevant, the weather decided the itinerary and children were simply sent outdoors after breakfast produced something that most modern holidays are substantially worse at delivering.
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